Chapter 8

She Could Not Remember the Pain

The day before surgery, Elena recovered part of an old memory.

She asked to see Dante.

They sat in the treatment center garden with an empty chair between them.

“Today I remember the first time I saw you,” she said.

“You stopped one of your men from hitting a stable worker. I believed a man who protected someone weaker would never hurt his wife.”

Dante lowered his head.

“I hurt you.”

This time, he offered no defense.

“I left our plans for Bianca.”

“I took your security status and gave it to her.”

“I learned that you had loved me for seven years, then made you sit beside me while I protected her again.”

“You were ready to tell me about your illness, and I left.”

His voice dropped with each admission.

“It was not family duty. Bianca did not force me.”

“I made every choice.”

Elena listened.

“I believe you regret it.”

Dante looked up. For one moment, hope entered his eyes.

“Regret cannot return the years I lost.”

The hope disappeared.

“If you hate me, I can wait.”

Elena looked at him.

“I do not remember the pain.”

That answer broke something in him.

He had once feared her anger.

Now he wanted her to hate him.

Hatred would mean that something between them still remained.

“After surgery, I may forget you completely,” Elena said.

“You cannot tell me we were married.”

Dante’s hands shook.

“You cannot use photographs or the ring to make me depend on you again.”

“Elena.”

“The woman I become will not know why I refused you.”

“You have to protect the choice I made while I still remembered.”

Dante stayed silent for a long time.

At last, he lowered his head.

“I will.”

Elena handed him their wedding photograph.

She wore Bianca’s altered dress and smiled with complete trust.

“You do not want to keep it?” Dante asked.

“I do not remember why I was so happy.”

His tears fell onto the photograph.

He did not wipe them away.

“Do you love me now?”

Elena thought before answering.

“I know that I did.”

“I cannot feel it anymore.”